bugz. I want to share a little things to you. it's maybe why I'm still alone until this day.
everybody get hurted. everybody in love. I've ever feel that two kinds. disakiti, ga akan ada yang milih satu itu, tp semua pasti pernah ngerasain ya -____- you know if I had two exboyfie, and I want to tell you bugz, about the feeling of two month disconnected love with one from those boys. dulu, waktu masih kelas 3 SMP, aku masih sama dia. when I feel those happines, those laugh, wow, wonderful. yak, aku memang bahagia bgt sama dia. he's the prince with that white horse. my mum adore him, dia deket sama semua temen-temen deket maupun sekelasku, dia tau apa yg kumau, dia selalu ada.. dan yang terpenting aku cinta, cinta bgt sm dia. hha.. skrg aku sadar kalo cinta itu bener bener buat orang berotak jadi kehilangan isinya. until that 9th month's we were together, semua itu dimulai. (mungkin kamu ga akan percaya, toh semua ga ada yang percaya kecuali temen deketku saat itu. chintya, agung, do you still remember?) tiba-tiba setelah ngucapin happy ninth months ke aku, dia hilang. bukan hilang bohongan, hilang bener-bener hilang. ga bisa dihubungin, dicari ke sekolah ga ada, mamanya? ga ngasi kabar. dan aku cuma bisa lewat, lewat aja depan rumahnya karena stres berat ga dihubungin. but I still calm, remembering if maybe he didn't have any pulse and went somewhere with his fam. besoknya, aku sms dia. kabar? dapet? ga. nihil. masih sama sama kemaren. lebih gilanya, dia non-aktifin nomor hpnya yg awal sm akhirnya sama sama aku. 7 :" (skrg kalo aku cerita, gak sesedih saat-saat itu. bahkan aku cerita sambil ketawa, karena itu mungkin ya temen-temenku ga mau percaya? ah whatever-_- tapi bukan itu juga ya alesanku suka 7!) tetep tenang. hari ke2, ke3, ke4, masih sama. tp aku masih sms-in nomor hapenya yang udah ga aktif itu. panjang lebar. pagi, siang, malem. nonstop. ngabarin aku lagi dimana, baik-baik aja, and miss you. (bodoh? tertawailah aku) sampe udah 2minggu, aku mulai capek nunggu balesannya, aku semakin jarang sms dia. but in class, I never laugh, ore sharing humor again. my friends said that I look like vampire. it's like I'd die.. mau apalagi? sakit hati nangis-nangis? please, itu ga akan ngembaliin dia. sampai mamanya ngesms aku yg lagi up.. dia .......... sakit. I can;t tell you what kind it is. pertahananku lepas, aku nangis saat itu juga. temen-temenku selain agung & chintya akhirnya ngerti kenapa sikapku belakangan ini. so, they made me feel better with ask me to go everywhere, treat me with lolipops, bears, and others. I still the same, sampe sebulanan lah -____- tp setelah masa susahku lewat dan aku mulai balik lagi, bahagia lagi, canda lagi sama temen-temen? dia balik ke Bali. wow, great. dia sms aku. sms yg rasanya dia buat kayak ninggalin aku 1 jam aja. HA! I felt broke. but I still loving him that day, so I want him come back again to me, tapi ada yang beda gitu. he wouldn't his mom text me, gaven't his brother go out with me, and many more. sampe kita 1th 4 bulan, I know that he cheated me! GOSHHH!
so.. maybe I can't loving someone like that again cause I'm affraid. aku takut, jd aku nutup diri dan susah bgt buat sayang sama cowok segitunya lagi. haha.. pembelaan bgt ya? tp mau apa, aku emg bener-bener susah suka sama cowok sekarang -__- and, uhm, for someone...
"nekomu, žal, če vam ne morem sprejeti, ampak jaz te ljubim, kot sem lastnega brata"
sorry. and see! I got a big lolipop today from kak dwipa. big thanks kak, I love it muchh! :D who'll share the lolipop with me? I'll wait <3 thanks, bugz. finally my heart's feeling "plongg" :p without you I don't know where I must type this story. Ms. Words? it's not... as interesting as youuu! mwaahhhh bugz:*
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